2/17/2015

Snow Day Snippets

At last, I had my first official snow day of the school year today.  And it wasn't a total nightmare digging out my car, unlike last winter (here, here, and here). Oh yeah, and no old people have hit my car. Yet. (I think the guy from last year is doing his handiwork elsewhere now.)

Not that I love doing short bits, because I'd really love to expound on some of these, but, well, time has not been on my side for the past three weeks and I really need to take advantage of this day off to do some catching up with my life.  It has been really difficult to get things moving--you'll see why in some of the following bullets--but I'm hoping that things will start moving forward.  Especially if I just keep trying.

So, what's been going on?

  • The Super Bowl party mentioned in my previous post was smaller than expected, which was fine with me.  Got to meet Chef's cute little niece (and he was asked to be her godfather, which put him over the moon) and aside having to cover up my really bad nausea from the antibiotics I was still taking, things went well.  Chef's little bro thought I was OK (his dog didn't, but the dog seemed to hate anyone who had cats).  And Chef's bro's in-laws, who hosted the party, were absolutely lovely.
  • Of course, that night, Chef's entire right hand looked swollen in spite of two prior treatments and antibiotics for an infection in his finger and I (firmly but lovingly) asked him to see the doctor in the morning. By Monday night, he was in the hospital having emergency surgery.
  • Althought I didn't see it until later, this article came out the same week I was spending that Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday night visiting Chef in the hospital.  The bottom line of the whole thing is the same reason I agonized over saying it myself: Don't say it unless you are "ready to do the work" that loving someone requires.  I didn't expect to be put to the test so soon, but when the person I love was in pain, sleepless, and lonely in the hospital, I hurt for him and did what I could to distract him from the pain (hint: crack jokes because you're even funnier to someone on painkillers!) and, thanks be to God, was able to get him to fall asleep after that first awful post-surgery night of no sleep.  Seriously, he was out cold and didn't wake up when I took off his glasses and kissed him on the forehead before slipping out.  Later when he woke up and asked the nurse where I was, she told him I'd left because he was snoring--nice nurse, huh?
  • As of right now, his hand is healing really nicely according to the doctor.  He will need a little physical therapy and obviously is not working. 
    That probably was the scariest part of the whole ordeal--it wasn't his dominant hand, but still, he needs both his hands to work.  (Also? Not easy to ask for help with things, but God bless him, he has been bearing it patiently.)  So any and all prayers are welcome that the healing and therapy go well and in a timely fashion.
  • I've been doing my best at school but let me tell you, it is extremely difficult to teach when on top of being tired and worried about someone you care about, your students haven't been outside for recess or much of anything else because it's so darn cold out. Please can winter be over soon???
  • That's why this weekend was great: in-service on Friday which is simultaneously encouraging and frustrating (meeting with the librarians from the other elementary schools), Saturday was a really nice dinner out with Chef's parents and godparents (I passed with flying colors) followed by drinks and conversation at the location of our first date, and then Sunday, for the first time, I cooked him dinner and he loved it.
  • Sunday's menu was Fire-Roasted Tomato and Lentil soup (from here), Prosciutto-wrapped Chicken and Green Beans, and a Baked Pear Dessert, tweaked so it didn't have chopped nuts to bother me (from here which I owned for years but hadn't used much).  I really enjoyed cooking for him, but I'm worried I've set the bar too high--but maybe I'll just make this and all my problems will be solved (yeah, I'm a little skeptical).
  • All my problems except The Cat's poor table manners, that is.  Guess who jumped on the dinner table three times--once to try to eat the roses, and then twice to get to the chicken.  I guess it was that good!


This is about all I can allow myself to do right now--gotta go do some annoying paperwork and see if I can get the bedroom righted at least somewhat (because that's where you put all the stuff you want out of the way when you're cooking dinner).  I hope to return soon!

  

2/01/2015

My Theme Word for 2015


Can you believe we're already a month into 2015?  I can't.

Probably because I've been dealing with ridiculous, incorrectly-predicted winter weather, not to mention an all-nighter in the ER last week. 

Yeah, four years without a problem, and I got blindsided.  I'm so angry about it I can't even discuss it further.  Except to say that once more I feel betrayed by my body and I hate having my flaws, if you will, exposed. (Because you have to admit them to SO MANY: your friends, your parents, your new boss, your new boyfriend.)

But that's a pretty good segue into my theme word for 2015, actually.  You might recall that last year was my first time selecting a word and I think that Confidence worked out pretty well.  (If I do say so myself.)

This year's word?

TRUST.


My brain had been churning the idea of choosing a new word on New Year's Eve, considering how everywhere I looked I saw/read/heard stuff about making resolutions (which I have stopped doing).

But it wasn't until I was out on Date #2 with Chef that it really crystallized for me, without my realizing it.  Our perky server (a teacher, naturally), was asking out of friendliness I'm sure and it just rolled right off my tongue.

"I don't make resolutions, but I choose a word for the year."

She was intrigued and asked if I had picked one yet.

"I think it's gonna be trust," I said without even a pause.  She was impressed.  I think I surprised Chef a bit, too.



It's going to be a challenge, I know that much.


Right now, I'm in a new job that I'm still learning and don't know what will become of it at the end of the school year (just passed the halfway point this week, BTW).  I'm in a new relationship and it feels so vulnerable to say I have a health concern I deal with every day.  (Some people really consider things when they're looking at a future with someone who could get sick from time to time.)  So I have to trust he won't run.

And I'm totally annoyed with said health concern right now because I thought I was doing all the right things to keep it at bay.  I don't trust it to calm down and stay calm for a long while.  Maybe it won't be four years again but four months.


But I have to trust.


I'm about to go to my first get-together with Chef's family.  I've already spent time with his parents (see Date #2 and they remember me anyway) but his younger brother doesn't remember me and his cousins are dying to meet me.

I'm anxious.  I don't feel 100% right now with all the antibiotics making me queasy and I'm back on the effing low-fiber diet I hated so much in 2010 that doesn't really offer all the healthy choices I usually enjoy.  I'm not wearing the jeans I'd rather be wearing because with the stomach upset it's hard to get them buttoned.  (Ugh.)  But I have to trust that the way I'm feeling is temporary, that things will get better. . . and honestly, who wouldn't love meeting me?  


I have to trust in the confidence I built up in 2014.